Introduction:
Getting angry is ok, as long as you get angry for the right reason, with the right person, to the right degree with appropriate tone, and language. These are the words by Aristotle.
TMOD, Toastmasters and guests, very good morning!
In a survey, it is seen that 70% of the people with lower IQ levels performed better in their professional and personal lives compared to the people with higher IQ levels. That is when there was a research and it was found that there is another important factor that influences the performance and success of a person. They named it as "Emotional Intelligence".
Body :
We see situations where an IIT topper fails miserably in his professional and personal life while a school-drop out becomes successful in both. This is because of this factor called "Emotional Intelligence". To be successful in life, Emotional Intelligence plays a vital role. There are four stages in Emotional Intelligence.
1. Self Awareness
2. Self Management
3. Social Awareness
4. Relationship Management
1. Self Awareness:
In the first stage you should be aware of the emotion you are currently experiencing. For example, jealousy, anger, stress, depression etc. When you are not aware, you will never be able to control it and manage it. Once you are aware of the emotions you are undergoing, it will be easier to use it to the right proportion to drive for results. This requires a bit of self analysis
2. Self Management:
While being aware of your emotions is easier, managing them is a challenging task and it comes only out of practise. We should keenly observe the people around us, how they handle tough situations smartly managing their emotions and rightly using them for success. We should also observe our self and find out how effectively or badly we have handled a particular situation. We can make a note of all possible alternative ways we could have handled the situation better. This will help us to take control of similar situations in future. We mostly face similar challenging situations and if we keenly observe, there will be a pattern for all the tough situations in both our personal and professional life.
3. Social Awareness:
Once you are aware and can manage your own emotions, you can start assessing the emotions of the people around you. Given a distressing situation, people around us are also pressurised and they under go a series of emotions. Understanding the emotions of people around us, is the third stage of emotional intelligence. Once you are aware of what is running in the minds of your opponents, you are almost there to have an EQ score of 75%.
4. Relationship Management:
Now that you are aware of your own emotions and know to manage them and are aware of your opponent's emotions. You need to now build a bridge with your co-workers or family members and build trust in them. It takes months or years to build trust. But once it is built, nothing can shake the relationship you share with that person. That trust becomes a healthy relationship.
Conclusion:
To put emotional intelligence to practice, take up one skill at a time and work on it. Take up Relationship management as the last one as it requires a high score on the other three levels. To even start practicing the fourth level we need to have a decent score for the first three levels.
Once we have practiced all the four levels and have mastered all of them with high scores, what happens next? Does it guarantee a successful life?
Imagine, when you learn to play the piano and practice the skill for 3 years and become a master of it and for the next five years you have totally lost touch. Later you try to put your hands on the piano, what happens? The same holds good for emotional intelligence as well. It is a continuous process and needs continuous practice. Once you master all the four traits, it will not guarantee a successful life unless you keep practicing and improvising on it through out your life.
Getting angry is ok, as long as you get angry for the right reason, with the right person, to the right degree with appropriate tone, and language. These are the words by Aristotle.
TMOD, Toastmasters and guests, very good morning!
In a survey, it is seen that 70% of the people with lower IQ levels performed better in their professional and personal lives compared to the people with higher IQ levels. That is when there was a research and it was found that there is another important factor that influences the performance and success of a person. They named it as "Emotional Intelligence".
Body :
We see situations where an IIT topper fails miserably in his professional and personal life while a school-drop out becomes successful in both. This is because of this factor called "Emotional Intelligence". To be successful in life, Emotional Intelligence plays a vital role. There are four stages in Emotional Intelligence.
1. Self Awareness
2. Self Management
3. Social Awareness
4. Relationship Management
1. Self Awareness:
In the first stage you should be aware of the emotion you are currently experiencing. For example, jealousy, anger, stress, depression etc. When you are not aware, you will never be able to control it and manage it. Once you are aware of the emotions you are undergoing, it will be easier to use it to the right proportion to drive for results. This requires a bit of self analysis
2. Self Management:
While being aware of your emotions is easier, managing them is a challenging task and it comes only out of practise. We should keenly observe the people around us, how they handle tough situations smartly managing their emotions and rightly using them for success. We should also observe our self and find out how effectively or badly we have handled a particular situation. We can make a note of all possible alternative ways we could have handled the situation better. This will help us to take control of similar situations in future. We mostly face similar challenging situations and if we keenly observe, there will be a pattern for all the tough situations in both our personal and professional life.
3. Social Awareness:
Once you are aware and can manage your own emotions, you can start assessing the emotions of the people around you. Given a distressing situation, people around us are also pressurised and they under go a series of emotions. Understanding the emotions of people around us, is the third stage of emotional intelligence. Once you are aware of what is running in the minds of your opponents, you are almost there to have an EQ score of 75%.
4. Relationship Management:
Now that you are aware of your own emotions and know to manage them and are aware of your opponent's emotions. You need to now build a bridge with your co-workers or family members and build trust in them. It takes months or years to build trust. But once it is built, nothing can shake the relationship you share with that person. That trust becomes a healthy relationship.
Conclusion:
To put emotional intelligence to practice, take up one skill at a time and work on it. Take up Relationship management as the last one as it requires a high score on the other three levels. To even start practicing the fourth level we need to have a decent score for the first three levels.
Once we have practiced all the four levels and have mastered all of them with high scores, what happens next? Does it guarantee a successful life?
Imagine, when you learn to play the piano and practice the skill for 3 years and become a master of it and for the next five years you have totally lost touch. Later you try to put your hands on the piano, what happens? The same holds good for emotional intelligence as well. It is a continuous process and needs continuous practice. Once you master all the four traits, it will not guarantee a successful life unless you keep practicing and improvising on it through out your life.
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